Sometimes I need a break, a break from my routine life. I get tired of being this super human person. Sometimes I need a break from being the shoulder everyone leans on. At times I need a shoulder to lean on but I have to suck up how I feel about any and everything because I fear that if someone catches wind that I actually don’t have it all figured out, I’d appear weak. I’m not weak, I just need a break. Not a long break, just a break that lasts forever. At times I feel like superman, cape and all. I have gotten so used to not opening up and talking to people that I fear that I might have forgotten how to let someone be there for me but that's all I really want. Someone to be there for, me. It seems as if everyone has a hidden agenda these days. Like no one is as dependable as you need them to be. Feels like everything I say is written down and saved to be used against me and you can’t really enjoy the company of another person when you feel like that. I want to let my guard down though, I miss how much I use to smile before I had to be strong for everyone. I am sorry. I have to start living for me now.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
The thing is you know you should have been walked away. You ignored the signs and got comfortable. Every time you got that gut feeling to walk away you ignored it thinking this time would be different from the last. You fed into the lies, the countless nights you lay in bed alone wondering why you are alone; you wake up wishing it was all a dream. You hung on to the good days as you cried wondering how someone could not love you as much as you loved them. The time passed so fast, 1 week turned to 2 months which turned into years. Now you feel you have come too far to start all over with someone else. You have invested too much time, too many tears, too much money to just walk away. When you close your eyes you see you and this person together, happy, smiling, and in love. You did all that you could to make this work. If you walk away now, what would that say about you? You love this person, are you giving up too soon? How soon is too soon? Is it worth starting all over? Will you be alone? Question is why do you feel alone while you’re with someone? Question is, how many excuses have you made for this person? You could see other people but then you a just get mad at yourself and the other person like, why can’t you give me the kind of attention this new person is giving me. You know me better this stranger and yet you treat what we have like it’s nothing. You treat me like I’m nothing. You know about my ex’s and why it didn’t work with them and yet you turned around and did the same thing. But.. Who can you be mad at? You can’t be mad at the person you dealing with because you could have been walked away. You could have been ended all the madness, all the uncertainty, all the questions, all of the let downs, and all of the bullshit. But, you didn’t. So you can only be mad at yourself when it all falls down. This person has been the same since you met them. You just built this person up in your head to be everything you ever wanted in a lover and as the time passed; you realize that it’s all false. That you set yourself up to be let down. -Dizzy
Monday, March 7, 2011
After talking to a few females, they all disagree with me but I know why they’re disagreeing with me. How long can you “talk” to someone? Realistically, how long can you just “talk” to someone before you realize that you two are just fuck buddies who can’t let go or move forward? In my opinion after three months of talking to someone with no title or word on what’s going on, you two are just fuck buddies. I just don’t believe that two adults can just be casually spending time together and fucking for a long period of time. Fool, this isn’t college. When will one of you decide to be together and make a future? The woman is the one who usually plays backseat in this situation waiting on the guy. At what point does somebody stop and say this has to change? I believe people get comfortable.
Too many people getting their emotions wrapped up in casual sex friends and become hurt if it doesn’t have the cliché Disney happy ending. You can’t date someone forever. It’s like counting months. Your baby can’t be 234 months old. At one point it has to stop. Why do we date? To get to know someone, enjoy ones company and feel them out; right? If that’s so, if it takes you more than 6 months to feel someone out and make a decision on if you want to be with them you might want to hang it up. That person isn’t for you. If it takes someone longer than 6 months to commit then that’s also a problem. These days though, you don’t even have to commit.
You can get whatever you want from a casual friend if you’re a guy such as sex, gifts, company, etc. So, is it a point in getting a title? What can you do differently if we add this title? You already give me the world without me saying I’m yours. You giving me your all while I’m still on the market. You are giving me the world while I’m still community property! Ladies you need to stop being dumb in the name of love and faith. Having faith that even though you do any and everything for someone who isn’t yours that they’ll come around and will be yours. The shit doesn’t always have a perfect ending if ever and when you do that you come out the victim with yourself to blame. But can someone tell me, how long can you just “talk” to someone or “date”. Be realistic with me now. -Dizzy
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
To every female who think a man is just supposed to know how to please you and how to make you happy… Die. That’s just dumb to me. I have realized that women really do expect men to read minds and just know everything. How are we supposed to just know these things? How to please you in bed, how you feel, what you want to eat, if you really meant not to get you anything for your birthday, etc. That’s just funny. I’m really convinced that some of you are crazy! I don’t even know where to go with this post. I just think it’s crazy.
Men we are just fucked. We can’t say we don’t like anything. We have to like everything because if we don’t its trouble. Disagree? Tell a woman you have been dealing with for more than a couple months or so that you want her to suck your dick differently. She will first take it personally. Then she will wonder why you all of a sudden want it better so now you cheating. It will fuck with her confidence because all women think they’re perfect right out the box. <-- That is true; no woman will admit it though. Tell a woman you don’t like something she cooked. That’s beef! “Oh, so you don’t like my cooking now???” It could be that she added too much of something or didn’t add enough of something. She will take it to the extreme and probably won’t cook for you for a couple weeks. I know because I’ve had it happen to me, TWICE!
So women want men to read minds and men can’t tell the truth about anything pertaining to a woman and her performances. It’s kind of funny because we always wonder why shit don’t work out when we date but have yet to realize that the problem is right in our face. YOU! -Dizzy
I don’t like how black men put so much pressure on black women nor do I like all the expectations black women have for black men. Nothing is keeping relationships from working other than both black men and women knowing what it is to be committed. Knowing what it is to actually love themselves as well as someone else unconditionally. The Game came on last night and Melanie wanted to spice up the marriage by having a threesome. After the show went off you could tell that some women felt some kind of way about that. Ladies you not knowing how to keep or not being able to keep a man around has absolutely nothing to with threesomes. Most men fantasize about a threesome but men know the difference between fantasy and real life. Trust, no man would leave a good woman because she don’t want to have a threesome.
First, the shit was just a t.v. show. Stop reading into it too much. Women like finding anything to fill in gaps with their love life or the lack thereof. A woman with an idle mind and a lot of questions will probably be the reason the world ends. True indeed what you don’t do or not willing to do another woman will but that’s refers to head, anal, sex in public places, etc.
Both sexes tend to hold the other to high ass expectations. We expect more from our lover then we expect from ourselves which is not fair. We both have this made up person in our head that is in fact perfect and compare people we date to this person. A perfect person does not exist and if they did what makes you think they would want your ass? With doing this we fuck up a lot of good things by always thinking that something better is out there. We might take these movie and t.v. relationships a little too serious. Nothing stays perfect forever; you will have problems out of any and everything. You just have to learn how to fix problems. Once we both get it in our head that nothing is perfect and you might actually have to fight for love and to keep a relationship healthy it will always fail. -Dizzy